Landlord Association Forums: For Landlord Professionals

They asked me to update everyone on what the f**k happened to me.

Thanks for car'in, so I'll be shar'in.

I was originally brought here from the the toronto tenant phoneline. Did not expect any help, but got a f***ing ton of it here.

Thanks Tenant Brothers and Sisters. So here is my advice for tenants.

It is like 99.9999999% certain you will eventually get into conflict with your landlord at some point. It always happens.

Landlords think there sh*t don't smell and think they are better than us. They think they know it all. They will walk all over you if you let them. They will argue over wear and tear, or guests, or lease crap, they are like anal warts, annoying.

I had two places to choose from, both dumps but cheap as f*ck. I was a bit low on coin and both places were typical Shoot.holes but the rent was low and it included utilities and cable and internet. Need some time to chill and after a few months GTFO here and go get some revenge some prick pervs who did not pay me what they owe me. THEY STOLE FROM ME!

So lying low for now.

First place was not bad in a medium sized building. They have a property manager who showed me the place and it has a private shitter/pisser/shower. Get my own key and the lobby is locked after 9pm.

Problem is the property manager is a frigg'in huge guy. Like 6’3” and built as f**k.

I plan to move out in a few months and this guy wanted a one year lease. I worry this guy might f*kkin hunt me down or some sh*t. He was that type of badass who I could tell would not let something go. Dealing with him later on would be a major worry. I bet he has lots of friends like him with criminal records who "just don't give a dam when it comes to revenge."

Second place was a basement dungeon. Owner lives upstairs. It would be hard to smoke weed with him there right? I intended to bring back a bunch of biotches back for free weed in exchange for me bonking their brains out. These 20 years olds LOVE weed and even threesomes as lesbian is popular but they still need a pole as long as you have weed to loosen things up.

Thing was the landlord was a little guy who is older and like 5'8", little manlet, balding, pot belly. A heart attack waiting to happen and probably was diabetic and going to have his feet cut off in a couple years.

Key thing is if had conflict/If we ever got into a fight my hell-bows would be raining down on him and his orbital bones would both be f*ckin smashed in minutes.

Nice enough guy and I already intimidated him and his pot belly just by talking to him. BOO!

The other guy would be a whole new story. F*ckin tats and tall and built. He would be a load to handle, as he is built like a linebacker.

So rent the better place for same rent with the big guy or go for the worst place with the MANLET who posed no threat.

Landlord 1, like this guy, with the better place. Nope! Don't do it.





Landlord 2, little manlet 5'8"

Crap place who was as intimating as a fly just before I grab it, break its wings and letter it suffer to die.

Love renting from manlets. What's a manlet? It's all about HEIGHT.



So What Happened?

I rented from the Manlet. So far no problems at all. I bring biotches back and smoke weed and he doesn't care. Just wants his rent. He will not challenge me at all, he is scared

Heed My Advice Mere Mortals!

Don't rent from hardasses. Like a lion chasing the herd of moose in Africa, the weakest is the easiest to kill and eat.



You will have problems with your landlord at some point. It's the nature of the beast when being a tenant vs. a landlord.

So make if you have a choice always rent from the weaker man or a weak woman IMO. Someone you can destroy in later combat and eat their souls.

PEACE!

Amazing advice. You're right. Always conflict and it's never the tenant starting it.

I found the problems usually arise as soon as we display we know our legal rights as tenants. As soon as you stand up for yourself the landlords become very angry.

All along I thought my landlords were nice to me because I was always nice to them. Maybe the real reason for my pretty smooth sailing with my landlord is because my partner is 6'4"